Katoptronophilia: How to Turn Yourself on from Mirror Play

Who’s the fairest of them all?

When you’re the sexiest thing in the room, and your partner is distracting you from giving all that loving attention to yourself, what do you do? You COULD acknowledge your partner’s efforts, or you can stare at yourself in the mirror and mouth “I AM A GOD” just as you cum. You ARE a god in your world, and your partner needs to know, as your there-by-the-grace-of-you constituent, that they have performed their duties nicely, but DAMN you are fine. Welcome to mirror play - the kink that is essentially the sexy church of YOU.

What is Katoptronophilia?

Katoptronophilia is a fetish for mirrors, but more specifically, mirrors that are focused on you… while you are doing the nasty to yourself or others. Christian Bale introduced this visual to the world in the movie American Psycho when he eye-f*cked himself as he runs his fingers through his hair, winks, and shoots his finger guns. Pew. I think we can all sigh in relief at this next sentence. 

My mirror staring back at me (oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)

Mirror play does not have to be that cringy. In fact, it doesn’t have to be cringy at all. Some of us find that the best way to connect with ourselves is to get familiar with our reflections. Our imperfections, along with the parts we can’t get enough of, make us who we are inside and out, so falling a little bit in love with yourself might be the healthy bit of narcissism we all should employ.

But make no mistake - narcissism is absolutely in play here. The feeling of superiority over your partner, along with the demeaning dismissal of their presence and efforts, lead straight to narcissism but as long as it’s kept in check as a trait and not as an entire personality, it’s not a bad thing to have.

But Is It… Voyeurism?

Katoptronophilia falls under the umbrella of voyeurism, the major difference being that most voyeurs find pleasure or arousal in watching others, and mirror play is specifically about watching yourself whether with others or not. Without getting too much into the psychology, it’s about being both the watcher and the watched, with a dose of the aforementioned narcissism. 

So how do you channel your inner narcissist? How can you tap into mirror play? There are several paths to your bedroom goddess status. You can start alone, and nude, in front of a mirror slowly stroking yourself in admiration. You can escalate to masturbation, but some people might prefer dancing. You can also do this in reverse. Start a slow and sexy dance, slowly taking off your clothes and stroking yourself to masturbation. 

A Three-way With Your Reflection

If you want to engage with a partner during mirror play, have the consent conversation, install some well-placed mirrors, and get busy. Do what you would normally do as a start, but remember to look at yourself and take note of the positions you like to see yourself in and the actions you like to see yourself performing. To take it up a notch, consider acts where you would normally give your partner eye contact like missionary position, fellatio, cunnilingus, or sucking nipples. Instead, champion that inner narcissist and give that eye contact to yourself. Try putting a hood or a mask on your partner so the lack of eye contact isn’t as jarring. You could also adorn yourself with feather nipple clips or a beautifully done shibari chest harness with rope.

Remember, as the god(dess) you are, it really is your world and only you get to decide how to see your O face. Besides, katoptronophilia is the best way to turn “go f*ck yourself” into a positive!